Everybody keeps telling you that you ought to leave, but that advice isn't terribly helpful, since it is obvious that you already know you need to do that.
Often, many of the most difficult decisions in life are not what you should do - because deep down, you already know - but how do it. This is true for your decision right now.
A few thoughts for you on that:
1. Irrevocably commit to doing it. Book a meeting with the founders to discuss "something important". Or tell your significant other that you've decided to exit by a certain date. Just do something that commits you to this course of action.
2. Get creative about why you're leaving. Instead of leaving because the company is a sinking ship, think of a diplomatic, but still truthful, reason for exiting. For example, focus on what you are going to do next, and supply that as the reason: "I'm much more interested in working on this kind of technology/product/etc. and I want to go pursue my dream."
3. If you can't bring yourself to tell them your decision face-to-face, put it in writing. Email them to tell them what you've decided, and close it with, "Can we talk?" Then hash it out with them. This is a great way to be done with something (see #1) because once the email is sent, it's sent.
4. Always remember that it is never as bad as you think it will be. It's just business, they will understand your reasons if they are reasonable businesspeople too. If they're decent individuals you'll stay on good terms with them. They'll miss you, they'll be "disappointed", but they'll get over it. And don't be surprised if they've already expected you to do this months ago. It is usually obvious to employers when their employees are unhappy or frustrated.
You already know what to do. Now go get it done! Best of luck to you.
>> "I'm much more interested in working on this kind of technology/product/etc. and I want to go pursue my dream."
IMHO, this has some chance of hurting OP, depending on how similar the "new direction" is, how litigious they are and how successful OP is in what he does next.
Besides the fact that circulating resumes is just about the worst way to find a new gig, I don't understand the mentality that suggests he should give notice before finding a place to land.
Find a new job, then give notice.
I've worked in this field since 1995 and am an employer at a fairly sizable team now and I'll tell you this is pretty close to industry standard. Competent employers do not have an expectation that they're going to get a heads-up before you start interviewing.
Totally tangential to the issue discussed, but years ago I was doing interviews of college kids for dev jobs in a unix env. The recent graduates had had some unix in school, but not much. When asked some questions about it, one candidate let slip that he wanted to see what other people were doing so he started looking in their home dirs.
Was your sister working for you? If so, why? If not, how is this connected?
Also I'm not sure how the existence of a root user plays a part because on the vast majority of unix systems the default home directory permissions are permissive read (this was true in 1987 and is still true now) and if your sister didn't know about root users it seems fairly unlikely that she knew about chmod.
Second this. Nothing more awkward than giving notice and then not finding a job you're excited to move to. Unless your intent is to take a few months off anyway, in which case give a solid last date and make it happen.
It really depends. Yes, if you have a good idea about what you want to do, find a job doing that and give notice.
If you are uncertain, and your current employment situation is feeding that uncertainty, it might be better to get out. I say this as someone who didn't really realize the way I was being effected by my work situation until I heard from a few people who left ahead of me.
Yes, face to face is best. It sounds like they aren't oppressive, so this should be possible to do the right way. As someone who has both quit jobs and had staff quit on me with varying degrees of decorum, the way you handle it determines the long term result. You may be surprised at their response. If they have any experience, they will understand it is in their best interest to end things gracefully. It may not be comfortable the first few weeks, but time heals all wounds, and you may be able to use them as a reference or connection later on down the road.
PS if they throw more $ at you, don't bite. Chances are you will quit again within 6 months. Good luck!
Also worth noting -- if they offer more money, and you stay, that implies that you were leaving (or just threatening to leave...) because of the money (rather than discussing money with them in a more upfront way).
That would change your relationship somewhat, going forward, so don't do this unless you actually would be content to stay at the higher salary longer term.
Agreed. You can quit any job at any time, with little or no repercussion, if you do it politely and professionally. A catchall is "personal reasons prevent me from continuing at {wherever} at this time".
Overthinking it. Vague reasons work even with your spouse. And they can nag you - these folks you won't evem be sleeping with after you submit your resignation.
Often, many of the most difficult decisions in life are not what you should do - because deep down, you already know - but how do it. This is true for your decision right now.
A few thoughts for you on that:
1. Irrevocably commit to doing it. Book a meeting with the founders to discuss "something important". Or tell your significant other that you've decided to exit by a certain date. Just do something that commits you to this course of action.
2. Get creative about why you're leaving. Instead of leaving because the company is a sinking ship, think of a diplomatic, but still truthful, reason for exiting. For example, focus on what you are going to do next, and supply that as the reason: "I'm much more interested in working on this kind of technology/product/etc. and I want to go pursue my dream."
3. If you can't bring yourself to tell them your decision face-to-face, put it in writing. Email them to tell them what you've decided, and close it with, "Can we talk?" Then hash it out with them. This is a great way to be done with something (see #1) because once the email is sent, it's sent.
4. Always remember that it is never as bad as you think it will be. It's just business, they will understand your reasons if they are reasonable businesspeople too. If they're decent individuals you'll stay on good terms with them. They'll miss you, they'll be "disappointed", but they'll get over it. And don't be surprised if they've already expected you to do this months ago. It is usually obvious to employers when their employees are unhappy or frustrated.
You already know what to do. Now go get it done! Best of luck to you.